|—||MotiveWeight (via squats-and-salad)|
Ever since I’ve come back from New Orleans I have been SO unmotivated to do anything healthy. Its like once I get back into unhealthy eating and not exercising, it opens the flood gates and I cannot stop the flow.
It’s not that I ate horribly during my vacation, I just ate a lot. And drank a lot. And I had been so used to just drinking water or seltzer at home but once down there I was drinking sodas (for mixer), alcohol, sweet tea, and just things I haven’t drank in months, so now I miss those flavors as I’m transitioning back to water, tea, and milk (the basics…. how exciting).
And it sounds weird, but while eating healthy I feel like my stomach shrunk. But once I went on vacation and began eating a lot, I feel like I’m hungry ALL THE TIME now. So I’m trying to slowly cut down on how much I’m eating and watching calories more. But I didn’t realize how much going on vacation would take me off track, so I’m just trying to get back on the horse as quickly as possible.
My new goal is to be down to 180 by June. I think it’s a realistic goal seeing as I weigh 215 now (35 pounds in 3-ish months) but at the same time I’m not going to beat myself up if I don’t reach that goal. I just need something to aim at because at this point I just feel like I’m grasping at straws and feeling sort of blasé about weight loss. I’m just taking my time and going slow but of course I want to push the envelope and do this healthily and (dare I say) quickly.
A huge motivator for me is that I’m hoping to move and/or start graduate school in the fall, which would be in August, and I want to start with a fresh slate. I don’t expect to be at my goal weight (165, duh) by then but I want to have made significant progress.
There are some days I look back and think how far I’ve come since being 255. But at the same time I do not see the physical change in myself, which is a little disappointing. But I’m going to keep fighting and pushing because only I can do this for myself!
I’ve eaten so much today, and the past few days. I’m blaming it on the fact that my period is just around the corner. Like, I’m just craving food and sweets, and once I have sweets I want salt. Such a tangled web we weave.
Everyone in this house knows I’m trying to lose weight, but this morning my parents bring me a huge cinnamon roll from Panera and last night my dad ordered pizza.
Too much temptation.
there are so many girls on tumblr who started out thin and then started lifting and gained muscle and now they’re just muscular and cut and sexy and I know it’s difficult to put on mass, not at all do I want to belittle anybody’s hard work. but I get a sour taste in my mouth when these women…
My *Mardi Gras* weekend in food….. so. many. calories.
From clockwise: turkey po boy with fries, 28 oz strawberry daiquiri, red beans and rice, then an Abita beer, po boy and fries, and some Bojangles on the way home.
Other meals not pictured are: large vanilla iced coffee with muffin, breakfasts consisting of bacon, eggs, and biscuits, Dominoes pizza, Raising Canes, and more. I spent so much money on food its ridiculous.
I can definitely say that this was THE weekend of food. I ate, and ate, and ate. Then drank, and drank, and drank. And got super drunk/hammered 2 nights in a row.
I weighed myself this morning and saw a 3-pound gain but am overlooking it because 1) I was on vacation and ate a shit ton, duh, 2) my period is scheduled to start in 2 days, 3) I’ve been so dehydrated for the past few days so I’m most likely holding onto a lot of water.
But 3 pounds really isn’t huge in the grand scheme of things. I’m just happy that I had an awesome weekend with good friends and was able to forget the stresses in my life for a few days. And now I’m craving going back, and possibly moving, and immersing myself into Southern culture again. Because truth? I really, REALLY miss it.
After taking about 5 months off from my blog, eating healthy, and exercising, the above statement couldn’t be more true.
I’m looking back on the past few months and am really regretting how I just stopped; gave up for the time being. And how if I had just stuck it out, I would’ve been pounds closer to my goal weight. How if I just kept counting calories and buying healthy snacks then I wouldn’t be re-losing the same 5 pounds I had lost before.
And it sucks. But I can’t go back, only forward now, and learn from those few months.
We all have slip ups and bad days. Hell, I’ve had a bad past few days! On Saturday I went out to dinner with my dad, and when we get together we eat. So. Much. I had a burger and fries, when earlier in the day I ate at Panda Express (so much fried rice and orange chicken. Blah.) Then after dinner we had ice cream. I basically felt like I was going to die that night. Then Sunday I ate more junk. Monday I had lunch at a Chinese buffet and was SO STUFFED that I didn’t eat for the rest of the day.
Tuesday (last night) all “my shows” come on, and I’m so used to buying snacks and mindlessly munching while watching. So I debated for a few hours about whether I should get chocolate and chips to watch TV, and eventually caved. I certainly ate less than I thought I would, which is a great thing! But I still went over my calories by a lot. It’s one of those situations where I feel guilty but, at the same time, can accept its part of the journey; that everyone has slip ups and we shouldn’t beat ourselves up over it.
I know a lot of people losing weight set deadlines and try to lose the most weight in the shortest amount of time, but I would rather develop sustainable habits and still live a ‘normal’ life filled with foods I love than deprive myself.
I have been repeating the phrase, “Be stronger than your strongest excuse” lately. You know you have A LOT of excuses for yourself and your habits if you wind up at 255 pounds. This time around (losing weight), I’ve certainly been 110% stronger than my excuses. I used to not care. I would start and stop this weight loss journey for weeks at a time just because I thought, “I had ONE BAD DAY, I have to quit for a while and eat whatever I want, then I’ll start the first Monday of next month.” My thinking has certainly switched from that. If I have a bad day, I will jump right back into it the next day. I’m not going to lose time to reach my goals.
And now, moving forward, I’m determined to stay motivated, no matter what cravings or temptations come my way. Because wasting time is only hurting me in the long run. I’m nervous because I’m heading to New Orleans on Sunday and even though our 4-day trip seems tame (so far) I know there will be major temptations. And though I’m on vacation and want to have a good time, I’m determined to do that without going overboard. I’m so excited!
Oh my gosh. That is 16 pounds away from being 199, below 200. I haven’t been below 200 pounds since my FRESHMAN YEAR of college (hello, 2008.)
When I weighed myself this morning I was honestly very shocked. I had a few bad days this past week (chart above) with Valentine’s Day candy and cake and eating dinner out 2 nights. Not to mention I was on my period. And didn’t go to the gym that often because I was busy.
But despite all those things, I still tried to log my calories honestly and accurately. As you can see, I only went above calories a couple days, then some days I went below or was right at my daily goal.
Note: 2/17 is today (which I haven’t logged yet) and it’s only 10am so I haven’t had breakfast or anything. So don’t worry, I’m not starving myself today (or EVER!!!)
Some things to consider when losing weight:
- I eat back about half of my exercise calories. When losing weight and counting calories, you are already at a deficit, so putting yourself into MORE of a deficit by not eating back exercise calories could cause hunger, binges, and could possibly make you not lose weight. Yes, you need to eat… a lot.
- Drink fluids. Lots of water or even tea. As long as you’re hydrated.
- Exercise isn’t necessary but it helps. When I tried losing weight before I didn’t exercise… it clearly didn’t work. Now exercise is even more of a motivator to eat better. Plus, every time I leave the gym I feel amaaaazing!
- Prepare your meals ahead of time. I always, always pack my lunch for work the night before. I never did this before, would end up running late in the morning, and would always end up saying, “F*** it! I’ll just go to Taco Bell for lunch today.” No. Just prepare your lunch (and breakfast) and you will save calories.
Remember… losing weight is science, not magic! As long as you eat at a deficit and exercise, you will lose weight! I still eat pizza and burgers and cake and have lost 35 pounds so far. I never thought I’d be able to say that. But you have to have some indulgences and sweets or else you’ll never make it.
I just cannot believe I’m 16 pounds away from 199. Insane.